Listening to the rain, an old dream suddenly hits my brain. You know? That I loved you so much. Ah… maybe you don’t know. Okay, I admit, not maybe. You actually don’t know that I loved you. More than a friend. More than a brother. More than normal things.
And I hated you. I hate you. I will hate you till the end of my life. Just because I loved you so much. I even remember the way you touched my hair and said “So soft”. I can’t forget the first present you gave even though I broke it by my own hands. I loved your smile when you said you had girlfriend.
Betray.
I even couldn’t feel my heart. No pain, no hurt, no sad… Nothing. Empty. A wind blew all things into the dark where you and I couldn’t find each other. I wanna hide. But I wanna go out to kill you. For no reason. Because I didn’t feel angry. No other emotion.
I just hate you.
But… you sometimes bother me. Ah no. You don’t. It’s just my memories. My memories about you come to my mind then they make me wanna cry. Cry? Cry because of someone I hate? It’s so weird. But sadly, it’s true.
And I just hate you more.
Like a joke, you are the only one who can make me go crazy like that. I won’t try to forget you, because someone said “The more you try to forget, the more you remember”. But even when I don’t do anything, you and our memories still attack me like a tsunami. Tsunami destroy all, then people re-buil all. Like me, my heart, my mind are crazy, after that, I can act as if nothing happened, then “wait” for another huge wave.
Today, I broke a pencil. You know what? I hoped that the pencil was your neck.
1/“Em đã sống với anh 5 năm rồi.” (Hanbin – Kony’s island)
Dark D.U 